Day 6 free of drink and drugs
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2021
Posts: 154
76 days sober of cannabis today, longest I’ve been in 20+ years feel a lot better, still very tired hopefully will pass soon. Exercising has been a great help to regulate my moods and help with stress. Hope everyone is good on this sunny Friday
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 9,415
Hi FreddyGeorge!!
THANK YOU for being here and for offering me inspiration.
Today I'm 20 days alcohol-free, 16 days weed-free..... longest stint free of both concurrently in quite a long time. I've had on-again-off-again sobriety from each in my ongoing struggles to be truly ready to live fully sober since I left sobriety in 2019.
My story is long and meandering, but the short of it is that I had nearly six years sobriety from both cannabis and alcohol in 2019. Because I wasn't really 'working on my sobriety' in any way by then (I'd stopped going to meetings, stopped thinking about evolving my emotional sobriety, stopped focusing on my spiritual development and was just in a sort of sober stasis in a stressful life) - I was dealing with depression and anxiety and ADHD symptoms.
A friend of mine had cultivated a low-TCH, high_CBD strain of cannabis that he said was really helpful to him in anxiety and depression. My state had recently decriminalized cannabis and my near-lifelong relationship with weed rose up and said "LETS DO IT!!!".
At first it was all very 'harmless'. Just a little here and there on weekends. Then, buying ounces.... then, my state fully legalized..... then, the pandemic... then, my younger sister died of alcohol..... then, I was a daily high-thc smoker, edibles user, all-in stoner again.... then... I started drinking again.
Since 2021/22 I have been yo-yo-ing through a half-hearted journey of attempts to regain my sobriety.
20 days ago, I became fed up with myself and truly regained my DESIRE to have my sober life back and to deepen and fully realize my authentic self, my relationship with Spirit, my sanity..... 16 days ago I had my last joint, realizing even as I smoked it that it was holding me back from all I could be, do and have in my life.
To help myself stave off those days where my addictive brain patterns are working, I told myself "I will 100% commit NOT to decide to even consider trying alcohol or weed again for one full year. I will allow myself that time to heal, to grow, to fully give myself to my commitment and my actions of sobriety and recovery, to embrace Spirit, to be everything I am able, every day". Ultimately, I don't want to go back to it. I want to be free of it and to be my full, authentic self. But given all the excuse-making and attempts of the past few years I needed to have that 'stopgap argument' for the odd day when my old patterns are working against me.
For me, the one always leads to the other.
Again, thank you for being here.... thank you for sharing..... it really helps me to have others committed to both alcohol and weed free living - as my state and my town have become absolutely over-the-top with both alcohol and weed 'culture'.
Life is too blessed and beautiful to impair it with these blunting, false-promising, limiting substances.
THANK YOU for being here and for offering me inspiration.
Today I'm 20 days alcohol-free, 16 days weed-free..... longest stint free of both concurrently in quite a long time. I've had on-again-off-again sobriety from each in my ongoing struggles to be truly ready to live fully sober since I left sobriety in 2019.
My story is long and meandering, but the short of it is that I had nearly six years sobriety from both cannabis and alcohol in 2019. Because I wasn't really 'working on my sobriety' in any way by then (I'd stopped going to meetings, stopped thinking about evolving my emotional sobriety, stopped focusing on my spiritual development and was just in a sort of sober stasis in a stressful life) - I was dealing with depression and anxiety and ADHD symptoms.
A friend of mine had cultivated a low-TCH, high_CBD strain of cannabis that he said was really helpful to him in anxiety and depression. My state had recently decriminalized cannabis and my near-lifelong relationship with weed rose up and said "LETS DO IT!!!".
At first it was all very 'harmless'. Just a little here and there on weekends. Then, buying ounces.... then, my state fully legalized..... then, the pandemic... then, my younger sister died of alcohol..... then, I was a daily high-thc smoker, edibles user, all-in stoner again.... then... I started drinking again.
Since 2021/22 I have been yo-yo-ing through a half-hearted journey of attempts to regain my sobriety.
20 days ago, I became fed up with myself and truly regained my DESIRE to have my sober life back and to deepen and fully realize my authentic self, my relationship with Spirit, my sanity..... 16 days ago I had my last joint, realizing even as I smoked it that it was holding me back from all I could be, do and have in my life.
To help myself stave off those days where my addictive brain patterns are working, I told myself "I will 100% commit NOT to decide to even consider trying alcohol or weed again for one full year. I will allow myself that time to heal, to grow, to fully give myself to my commitment and my actions of sobriety and recovery, to embrace Spirit, to be everything I am able, every day". Ultimately, I don't want to go back to it. I want to be free of it and to be my full, authentic self. But given all the excuse-making and attempts of the past few years I needed to have that 'stopgap argument' for the odd day when my old patterns are working against me.
For me, the one always leads to the other.
Again, thank you for being here.... thank you for sharing..... it really helps me to have others committed to both alcohol and weed free living - as my state and my town have become absolutely over-the-top with both alcohol and weed 'culture'.
Life is too blessed and beautiful to impair it with these blunting, false-promising, limiting substances.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2021
Posts: 154
Beautifully put FreeOwl.
I see no point blocking life’s emotions whether they are good, bad or indifferent. Life is for living not stumbling along not reaching our potential and not really knowing who we really are and what we want out of life.
I see no point blocking life’s emotions whether they are good, bad or indifferent. Life is for living not stumbling along not reaching our potential and not really knowing who we really are and what we want out of life.
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 1,005
Hey Freddie, congratulations on your cannabis free days and your decision to live more authentically, I'm sure you'll benefit hugely.
I'm on my own similar journey just down the road from you in sunny Somerset. I've been slowly having my teeth fixed up after two decades of neglect and I feel much better about myself for doing so. It's definitely a monkey off my back.
I've never been an habitual toker but whenever I did buy weed I found I couldn't control my use of it and I'd smoke from first thing in the morning till the end of the day and then hate myself for doing so. It's probably been a year since I last smoked a roll up or a joint and it's quite possibly the best gift I've ever given myself. Clear, clean breath, every, single, day. I love it.
Similarly I have never been a daily drinker but I got bored of the hangovers when I did drink and the constant second guessing as to whether I was drinking too much so I've kicked that into touch too. I feel so good after only a bit more than a couple of months of total sobriety it's hard to imagine ever drinking again. It's like I have a beautiful new life. Yay!
Good luck, Freddie, I'm excited for you.
I'm on my own similar journey just down the road from you in sunny Somerset. I've been slowly having my teeth fixed up after two decades of neglect and I feel much better about myself for doing so. It's definitely a monkey off my back.
I've never been an habitual toker but whenever I did buy weed I found I couldn't control my use of it and I'd smoke from first thing in the morning till the end of the day and then hate myself for doing so. It's probably been a year since I last smoked a roll up or a joint and it's quite possibly the best gift I've ever given myself. Clear, clean breath, every, single, day. I love it.
Similarly I have never been a daily drinker but I got bored of the hangovers when I did drink and the constant second guessing as to whether I was drinking too much so I've kicked that into touch too. I feel so good after only a bit more than a couple of months of total sobriety it's hard to imagine ever drinking again. It's like I have a beautiful new life. Yay!
Good luck, Freddie, I'm excited for you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 9,415
Day 79!!! Helps me yet again!!
I'm actually having zero desire for drink or weed, which is a shift. Many times I've entered the arena over the past few years and been plagued by the struggle.
There's something different now and I hold faith it will last. Part of it is the 'backup plan' of telling myself "stay sober and weed-free today. Once you've gone a full year, have a look back and see if there's even ONE good reason to drink or get hihgh".
But, mostly I think what's different is I'm spending EVERY day listening to recovery podcasts. I'm speaking with Spirit, EVERY day... all day. I'm asking for help from the Power That Moves The Universe. I've let go of my resistance, I even call that Power GOD quite frequently. In part, it's just easier. In part, it's a bit more personal.....
For much of my life I've believed on a deep level in the connectedness of it all. I've spent a lot of that time 'believing' in a space of rational belief. What seems to be shifting now is that I'm doing more of my believing with my Heart and with my Actions...
Anyway - thank you FreddyGeorge. You're giving me help and hope in addition to my own and my connection with Spirit....
Many's been the day when I've logged into the Marijuana forum and found no replies, heard and seen people in recovery from alcohol using marijuana as a coping mechanism.... heard from friends and seen on billboards on my way into town all he hyped-up glamour of how GOOD cannabis is for you!!! And it honestly has been hard to beat back the AV's messages "SEE!?!?! EVERYONE's using Marijuana. It's not a problem, it's GOOD FOR YOU!!!!". And more nefarious messages like "nobody REALLY sees Marijuana as problemtatic.... heck, you're on a RECOVERY forum and even there nobody's posting on the Marijuana threads..... c'mon, don't be LAME".
But, that's all just nonsense.
The things that interfere with my connection with the energy and the Sunlight of the Spirit are things that stand between me and my highest Self, my Service to my family, my community and the Divine.
Thanks, FreddyG.
I'm actually having zero desire for drink or weed, which is a shift. Many times I've entered the arena over the past few years and been plagued by the struggle.
There's something different now and I hold faith it will last. Part of it is the 'backup plan' of telling myself "stay sober and weed-free today. Once you've gone a full year, have a look back and see if there's even ONE good reason to drink or get hihgh".
But, mostly I think what's different is I'm spending EVERY day listening to recovery podcasts. I'm speaking with Spirit, EVERY day... all day. I'm asking for help from the Power That Moves The Universe. I've let go of my resistance, I even call that Power GOD quite frequently. In part, it's just easier. In part, it's a bit more personal.....
For much of my life I've believed on a deep level in the connectedness of it all. I've spent a lot of that time 'believing' in a space of rational belief. What seems to be shifting now is that I'm doing more of my believing with my Heart and with my Actions...
Anyway - thank you FreddyGeorge. You're giving me help and hope in addition to my own and my connection with Spirit....
Many's been the day when I've logged into the Marijuana forum and found no replies, heard and seen people in recovery from alcohol using marijuana as a coping mechanism.... heard from friends and seen on billboards on my way into town all he hyped-up glamour of how GOOD cannabis is for you!!! And it honestly has been hard to beat back the AV's messages "SEE!?!?! EVERYONE's using Marijuana. It's not a problem, it's GOOD FOR YOU!!!!". And more nefarious messages like "nobody REALLY sees Marijuana as problemtatic.... heck, you're on a RECOVERY forum and even there nobody's posting on the Marijuana threads..... c'mon, don't be LAME".
But, that's all just nonsense.
The things that interfere with my connection with the energy and the Sunlight of the Spirit are things that stand between me and my highest Self, my Service to my family, my community and the Divine.
Thanks, FreddyG.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2021
Posts: 154
Glad I can help 👊
Funny you should say about using cannabis to cut down / quit drinking. Similar to me but I then got to a stage where the only times I’d drink was whilst I was stoned (probably because I was always stoned) in for a penny in for a pound! I’d accurately say for me anyway ganja is worse as it’s more insidious and no one noticed I was always stoned so that used to be my go to. Especially since running my own business, to much freedom became a prison of my own making
I’m now safe in the knowledge I can’t use any substances safety, hell even sweets I gorge on, must be the addict in me. go big or go home.
Funny you should say about using cannabis to cut down / quit drinking. Similar to me but I then got to a stage where the only times I’d drink was whilst I was stoned (probably because I was always stoned) in for a penny in for a pound! I’d accurately say for me anyway ganja is worse as it’s more insidious and no one noticed I was always stoned so that used to be my go to. Especially since running my own business, to much freedom became a prison of my own making
I’m now safe in the knowledge I can’t use any substances safety, hell even sweets I gorge on, must be the addict in me. go big or go home.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 9,415
Originally Posted by FreddyGeorge 
Glad I can help 👊
I’d accurately say for me anyway ganja is worse as it’s more insidious and no one noticed I was always stoned so that used to be my go to. Especially since running my own business, to much freedom became a prison of my own making.
I’d accurately say for me anyway ganja is worse as it’s more insidious and no one noticed I was always stoned so that used to be my go to. Especially since running my own business, to much freedom became a prison of my own making.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2020
Location: NC
Posts: 5,967
Good Work on 79!
I can relate to everything yall are saying.
I was a daily smoker/ drinker for over 3 decades. Got rid of the alcohol over 4 years ago but the weed creeped back in and now it's a full on obsession again.
The weed AV does have more ammo with me also because unlike when I'm drunk I can function high. But the anxiety it now brings is rough. The things I put aside in favor of toking are adding up.
Anyway I'm gonna hang out here and hope I can get a spark to get back to Day1 no weed soon.
I also agree some of us get can addicted to anything. I speak from experience there.
Keep up the Good Work guys
I can relate to everything yall are saying.
I was a daily smoker/ drinker for over 3 decades. Got rid of the alcohol over 4 years ago but the weed creeped back in and now it's a full on obsession again.
The weed AV does have more ammo with me also because unlike when I'm drunk I can function high. But the anxiety it now brings is rough. The things I put aside in favor of toking are adding up.
Anyway I'm gonna hang out here and hope I can get a spark to get back to Day1 no weed soon.
I also agree some of us get can addicted to anything. I speak from experience there.
Keep up the Good Work guys
Member
Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Somerset
Posts: 1,005
Originally Posted by FreddyGeorge
I’m now safe in the knowledge I can’t use any substances safety, hell even sweets I gorge on, must be the addict in me. go big or go home.
For me it's the ADHD doing all the talking. Any substance (ANY!) which stimulates the reward pathways and gives me the dopamine hit that I'm naturally lacking in, creates the addictive behaviour.
Substances and activities I've engaged in addictively almost to the point of self anhilation include beer, sex, weed, work, caffeine, romance, wine.
I'm currently headlonging into addiction to daily sugar hits (specifically ice cream) & exercise (just completed a 400km hike carrying my own food and camping gear).
You gotta laugh!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
