Hopeful
Hopeful
Hello, world. I am back again. I can't believe I signed up so many years ago. I can honestly say now that alcoholism is a progressive disease.
I had a problem before but was in denial. I had a great life, a good job, parents that love me, my son is healthy. A functioning alcoholic. Now, years later, I am not functioning anymore. I'm lucky I'm not in jail and I can still save my life, if I quit now. I can save my relationships... if I quit now. If I don't stop, I will ruin my life.
I don't want to ruin my life.
I asked for help for the first time a few months ago. I didn't receive the answer I was looking for. My step mom (who also drinks a lot) said it's okay to drink as long as you take care of your responsibilities BEFORE you drink. She said she's probably an alcoholic but no one questions her about it because she's highly functioning. So of course I tried that approach and it didn't work.
My boyfriend enables me. He's supportive when I don't drink but also supportive when I do.
I'm staying with my mom for Easter. I'm a complete disaster. I've been drinking and she asked me about it. I told her everything... and she said I need to stop. Immediately. I told her I'm not getting any support and she said "man up". Nobody likes an alcoholic. People get sick of alcoholics. People get tired of baby sitting a drunk. It's nobody's responsibility but my own.
I wish I had told her sooner, because that's the best advice I've heard. I needed to hear that. Because I don't want to be a sloppy drunk. And I don't want to be a victim.
And the best support I can have is myself.
I can't rely on other people to make me better... I am scared. I'm terrified. But I will get better.
I had a problem before but was in denial. I had a great life, a good job, parents that love me, my son is healthy. A functioning alcoholic. Now, years later, I am not functioning anymore. I'm lucky I'm not in jail and I can still save my life, if I quit now. I can save my relationships... if I quit now. If I don't stop, I will ruin my life.
I don't want to ruin my life.
I asked for help for the first time a few months ago. I didn't receive the answer I was looking for. My step mom (who also drinks a lot) said it's okay to drink as long as you take care of your responsibilities BEFORE you drink. She said she's probably an alcoholic but no one questions her about it because she's highly functioning. So of course I tried that approach and it didn't work.
My boyfriend enables me. He's supportive when I don't drink but also supportive when I do.
I'm staying with my mom for Easter. I'm a complete disaster. I've been drinking and she asked me about it. I told her everything... and she said I need to stop. Immediately. I told her I'm not getting any support and she said "man up". Nobody likes an alcoholic. People get sick of alcoholics. People get tired of baby sitting a drunk. It's nobody's responsibility but my own.
I wish I had told her sooner, because that's the best advice I've heard. I needed to hear that. Because I don't want to be a sloppy drunk. And I don't want to be a victim.
And the best support I can have is myself.
I can't rely on other people to make me better... I am scared. I'm terrified. But I will get better.
Welcome back to the site. Coming here was the best thing I could do for my sobriety. I have learned so much and have received great advice.
Make a plan and stay close to this site.
You can do this!
Make a plan and stay close to this site.
You can do this!
Telling my mom about how I was on day one really made the difference for me. She really helped me in the beginning just by hanging out, taking me to get groceries, being there for me. Sounds like you got a good one too. Listen to her and your heart and not to drinkers, well not active drinkers that is:-)
Now you've made the decision that you want to get sober your friend is right, although I'd suggest not taking the every day part too seriously, inasmuch as, if you miss a day or two, it's not all spoilt and you can just get back there the next day. In my area there is only one a week, so all others mean travelling some distance, and with other commitments it would be extremely difficult to go every day. On the days I can't make it to a meeting I use speaker recordings and AA literature, and make phone contact with another AAERS or meet for coffee and a chat with one. AA can support you. It can offer fellowship and advice, and a means of learning how to be comfortable and happy in sobriety. If you work the steps, it can change your life.
I wish you all the best.
I wish you all the best.
Yes, absolutely yes. Many of us, me included, have alienated family and friends with our empty promises. When I finally decided to stop for good, it was me who had to make it happen. The upside of that is that I found I was a much stronger person than I ever believed. You can do this. And, you can always find support here.
Wow, consider yourself lucky to have such a wise mom. As I was reading the first part of your post, that's exactly what I was thinking, excuses and resentment, need to take some accountability, etc. And then, BAM, your mom says exactly that!
Well now that you know you need sobriety, go out and get it. Nothing stopping you, heaps of support here when you need it. And just remember, that first drink never works out well.
Well now that you know you need sobriety, go out and get it. Nothing stopping you, heaps of support here when you need it. And just remember, that first drink never works out well.
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